Certified Bureau of Superstitious Compliance. Every opening logged, every consequence still pending.
The Bureau of Superstitious Compliance exists to formally observe an act performed, against better judgment, since the invention of both roofs and umbrellas: opening one of the latter underneath one of the former. We now log it, certify it, and assign it a precise, climbing number.
Bad Luck accumulates continuously for as long as the umbrella remains open indoors, using a proprietary formula that factors in elapsed exposure, repeat offenses, and a generous margin for things the Office simply feels are true. The figure may rise arbitrarily quickly. It has never yet, in Office history, been accompanied by an actual falling ceiling.
Closing the umbrella pauses further accumulation. It does not, and structurally cannot, undo accumulation already certified. The Office's charter is explicit on this point: misfortune, once logged, is logged permanently, in the same way a declined dinner invitation is never un-declined.
Visitors are, surprisingly often, found reopening the umbrella after closing it. The Office does not discourage this. Each reopening is filed as a new, distinct offense, stacked neatly atop the last, under the working theory that cosmic retribution is, like most bureaucracy, purely a matter of total case volume.